Embarrassing Attempt at Spying by Dutch "Spies"

Russia has long monopolised the international spy trade. This is unsurprising, as 95% of the country's population gets into the business, and almost all of the Russian budget is used for spy creation and training.

However, the true extent of the chasm between the superior abilities of Russian spies and their non-Russian excuses for counterparts was revealed during the MAKS 2009 airshow in Moscow this August.

The airshow culminated in an espionage scandal, as the Russian Federal Security Service (widely known under the pen-name KGB) found two Dutch spies sauntering into a confidential military hangar. This lazy attempt at espionage is the latest in a long line of amateurish spyings from the West and even China. In 2008 alone, the FSB/KGB arrested 149 so-called "spies".

A hangar, possibly Russian, definitely confidential

The Weblog of watching and supervision for global Russian spy activities welcomes any attempts at spying that the countries of the world wish to make. However, they really must be of a certain quality.

The DDOS: "We are not your enemies!"

Many are already aware of the incident last week for Twitter and many other websites going down and being inaccessable. It is known technically as a "щебет-перерыв" (Twitterbork), and some had suspicions that it had been an attempt by the Russian Federation to silence a single lone Georgian blogger.

If the incident really did involve Russian Spyware, then it is of the utmost interest to the Weblog of watching & supervision for global Russian spy activity.

It would truly fascinate us to know if the Twitterbork was the latest in a long line of Russian internet attacks, which have been responsible for such notable overreactions as the one against Estonia's government, or the one targeting Georgia's tie-eating President Mikheil Saakashvili.

However, only the other day, the Russian Spy Watch was taken down from the internetscape. Access to "blogger", the control centre of the Russian Spy Watch Network, was restricted and Comrade Ilyich was denied to be allowed in for a long while.

It is with this background that Russian Spy Watch wishes to send the following message to the operators of the Russian Spyware: We are not your enemies! I seek only to understand you!

Russian Spies and the Missile Defence Network

Today's news are concerning the Czech government's finding of two more Russian spies in the Russian embassy. In the Czech Republic, Russian spies are more common than cats and the latest expulsions will hardly make a dent-- it is more of a political gesture and message that Russian spies should keep espionage to a bare minimum.

The dramatic expulsion of the two men, who worked as diplomats but held second jobs as Agent Provocateurs, was seen by Russian foreign minister Sergei Lavrov (left) as an unfriendly act. He promptly threw out two Czech diplomats in a 'sophisticated political reply' EUPHEMISM.

The espionage concerns the USAmerica's missile defence network, strongly opposed by chief Russian spy Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin. It is alleged that Russian spies, described as "on the loose" by Czech counterintelligence, went far beyond their usual spying duties in attempting to whip up opposition to the network in the Czech Republic.

The Russian Embassy in Prague, a venerable warren of Russian spies.

Russian spies have a considerable presence in the former Soviet republics like the Czech one. The Czech Security Information Service characterised Russian spies as "extremely active" in the Czech republic, and noted that Russian spy activities were at "exceptionally high intensity". A Russian spy identification handbook is thought to be on the horizon to address this problem.

"The Russians are Treacherous"

(Title: Old Turkish saying)

Russian Spy Watch has for some time had its eye on America’s Republican Party (Russian:Республиканская партия), a party widely regarded as infested with Russian spies. This is perhaps why today’s news is so aback-taking.

It concerns the Russian Spyish nature of Strobe Talbott, the man who served for seven years as Bill Clinton’s Deputy Secretary of State (DS of S), as well as advisor to the 2008 presidential campaign of Hillary Clinton. This perhaps suggests that the Democratic Party (Russian:Демократическая партия) is almost as prone to Russian infiltration as the Republican one.

Not even we expected DS of S Strobe Talbott to be operating as a Russian Spy-- and we have often been accused of flagrantly overstating the probabilities of people spying for Russia.

The man had infiltrated a respectable list of organisations, including Yale University, Brookings Institution, and TIME magazine, as well as the Democratic Party and of course the Government. Whatever the reader’s leanings regarding the subject of Russian spying, such achievements must be admired.

Impressive Russian Spy Strobe Talbott

Earlier this year, perhaps attempting to turn the tables, the Russian government made a surprise move in accusing the US of operating spies, perhaps to distract attention from its own horrendous spying record. Though these accusations may well be true, we at Russian Spy Watch believe the USAmerica has a long way to go to catch up with Russia in terms of spying.

Russian Spy Watching in London

The Russian Spy Watchers are first turning their gazes to London, the capital of the country the Daily Mail described as "teeming" with Russian spies. It is here in the capital city that politics is done and NATO documents are changing hands-- almost always, unwittingly, to Russians spies.

Today's news is of Kairat Abusseitov, the top Kazakh diplomat, London attache, and Russian spy, discovered on Saturday to have been spying for Russia for the last twenty years. He is one of countless other spies from the Содружество Независимых Государств (also known as the "Commonwealth of Independent States", or CIS). Several of such spies have been expelled throughout the years but trillions more remain safely undercover.

CIS executive secretary Sergei Lebedev (see right, stars on "this is what Russian spy looks like" cycling slideshow) has more than proved himself to Chief Russian Spy Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin since his appointment. There were understandable initial reservations, as Sergei had not joined the КГБ (KGB) voluntarily as Putin had.

The news of Mister Abusseitov's "outing" as a Russian spy comes only a few days after the USAmerica reported that it had spied two nuclear Russian submarines seemingly spying on its eastern coast. The Kremlin explained this as a harmless training exercise, but the submarines nevertheless headed north to spy on Canada last night under a cloud of suspicion.

This has likely compromised the mission, as secrecy is understood to be of the utmost importance to Russian spies.

Identification, Supervision, Understanding

Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin has this week commemorated his ten years of uninterrupted leadership of the Russian Federation.

Through use of the unfeasibly vast Russian spy network, the Russian PM keeps to this day an eye into every home, every school, and every government in NATO and the wider world: No position is immune from subversion; no NATO top-secret file goes unspied.

Analysts estimate one in every two people in the western world is "most likely a Russian spy", and the Russian PM has been known to read NATO documents even before those who drafted and wrote them.

It is with this background that we today unveil the Russian Spy Watch: the weblog for watching & supervision of global Russian spy activity.

It is my aim to bring wider attention to the global endemic of Russian spy proclivity, an endemic that has revealed such figures as novellist Ernest Hemingway, Queen Elizabeth's art advisor Anthony Blunt, and the Head of the Estonian defence system Hermann Simm to be none other than Russian spies passing NATO secrets to ten-year leader Putin.

Whenever new details emerge regarding the activities of the inconceivably huge Russian spy network, I will be here, watching the watchmen.